What does it mean to be a man in today's society? Most men love as if they were women and marvel when their spouses leave them. We fear attaining power because it requires a man of true strength and might to acquire and maintain power. The society we live in is doing its best to suppress masculinity in all facets of life. Yes, there are areas where males dominance is based on outdated and ridiculous laws of society. Its true that in those areas of life it is best that male dominance and the role therefore of the man to be evaluated. But fact remains, society is breeding more weak men now than any other time in history. The question, why is that the case? Where is the virile energy that governs manhood?
One day my friend confided in me a story that crushed him dearly. Only now after 5 years he feels comfortable with sharing the story with others outside his close circle of friends. Amazingly, this is a common story experienced by most guys who study and love being in love and simply love love. My friend told me that one day, he got a call from his lady. His lady sobbing through the phone, obviously my friend thought the worst. A death, or an illness, something that has affected his lady badly and now is eating her up. Little did he know that the call was for another reason. The sobbing was not for a death or an illness. What was eating her up was guilt. She called with her sobs to confess to a crime she had committed. She had slept with her ex. My friend tells me at first, he was calm. At first, he reassured her that mistakes happen and all will be ok. Later that day, like a wild wrecking ball, the reality hit him that another man has been where only he has. He felt crushed and utterly destroyed. He describes how he hated soapies afterwards. That with most soapies, the plot will revolve around this treacherous act and make a story out of it. When the reality is that when such an act is committed, it paralyses and breaks a man’s heart into a million pieces. And it becomes difficult to share this pain because society teaches us men should not cry. There’s no room for weakness in being man. Being a man, one has to be utterly emotionless.
And so, goes the pattern with a lot of men. Most heartbreakers and players of women, their attitude on women usually can be traced to such a moment when they were in love and got betrayed. Betrayal takes many forms. It is well known and it is even seen in most men-based relationship advice that a man must be indifferent to the emotions of women and his own. This cold, emotionless attitude men develop attracts women. Because their exhibit any emotion towards her besides love, she easily leaves. Many men share stories where they were angered by the actions of their women or saddened by them and the moment the man showed these emotions, their women most often leave under the premise that ‘he is unstable and immature to handle his emotions’. Good guys finish last because the bad guy get there first. One’s masculinity can be measured more reliably with his relation with women. The pure energies complement each other. The homosexual often vibe better with women because contrary to popular belief, they are more comfortable with the way their masculinity is projected. This gives them an advantage over almost every heterosexual who is confused and doesn’t know how to portray and project his masculinity.
The issue and concept of being a man in society has changed dramatically from the olden days. One will hear conversations of older men and how they marvel at how these young women now drive their own cars and live luxurious lives without the involvement of a man. Or that the luxurious lives they live and the cars they drive must be owned by the male counterpart because as a woman, how else did she manage to attain the wealth to acquire those items and that life? Older women envy younger women for their independence and how they can get what they want and when they want without the approval of a man. As women are finally attaining equal rights in society, somehow males are falling behind. We still cling to those prehistoric Orders of Manhood. That “I am a man and all women are beneath me” attitude. As males, we fail to see that times are changing. Some men hold to the old beliefs and most of the times they are the ones who turn out to be abusive that through brute force of their masculine strength, that's the only way to exert power over a female. Some other men become weaklings who never approach women because “oh gosh, what will she think of me?”. The very few men see the change of times. This very exclusive group of men understand that women complement man, she does not survive or rule him. This man is not afraid to steal your women if he really wants her. Because you might be the lion of the den but do not be fooled. There are other lions who want to evade your den and kill your cubs. If you not man enough to protect your pride, another man will take it away from you. This is a man however, respects the married woman and the women who are engaged because in those situations, the woman’s stand point is clear as which masculinity complements her. This extremely rare breed of men, they are the go-getters. The achievers who go after what they want and will not stop until they get it.
Its true the way in which society is trying to dissolving all outlandish principles is false. Instead of raising women to their rightful place, what society is doing is drowning the male’s voice into an abyss of weakness and despair. Most women cry that real men do not exist anymore. This is true. Men are being castrated daily by the media and reality shows that exhibit the man is these docile little puppies that are only good for flaunting money without first adding value to himself. The other half exhibits the man in a white vest with last night’s gravy, pot belly having abusive tyrant. Somewhere in between, somewhere in the tiny spaces of society, media does provide the right channels that teach the right depiction of the man. A warrior. A provider, a protector and a pro-creator. A human with humanlike emotions with the strength of a thousand bulls to fight for what he believes in. The perfect gentleman but with the heart of a warlord who’s ready to protect his family and his values and beliefs. A man. Proud and strong, ready to die for what he loves. This is the man in which women cry about. This is the real man. The real man who is slowly being drowned under the pressure and propaganda of modern day society.