Why does it seem so frightening to pursue that which makes you happy? Is it because one is going against the grain that makes the feeling so scary at first? Well, it is interesting that pursing one’s dreams carries with it, such a heavy fear.
The great personal development experts say that the reason why we feel so overwhelmed when pursuing our dreams is that our brains are designed for survival, not excitement. Survival is boring and plain but essential to remaining alive. This survival wiring seeks out the easiest route to living. The path of least resistance is the one most sought simply for that reason. It is a path that has the least amounts of challenges and worries.
It is the same with working out. Yes, it is true, working out can be addictive. Quite bluntly, working out can be fun. But the fact remains, working out is a lot of work. It is tedious and tiring. The stress and strain we exert on our muscles are factors of great magnitude. Yet, this stress and strain on muscle fibre is the way to build and strengthen muscles. Strong muscles warrants higher chances of survival in the world. The task of working out demands one to actively put themselves through that stress and strain in order to become stronger. To increase our chances of survival, it seems that one needs to override the default settings of the brain.
The path of least resistance is a path that the brain will choose all the time without fail. This path ensures that you survive. Taking the working out analogy, the path of least resistance creates an existence that is ordinary and basic. The notion of an ordinary life created by an extraordinary organ seems a bit left-sided. The power of the brain is untapped. The notion that the brain is designed simply for our survival becomes convoluted with doubt. Is our brains truly created only for the sole reason for our survival or is there more?
Well, of course there is more. Earlier today, the thought hit me like an unexpected snowball to the face. I was thinking about my project car and mentally listing the parts that I need to buy to get the project going. No one in my family (expect a few of my cousins) are mechanics so a car seems to be this very daunting, intimidating and complex machine. Even though, over the years, learning more about cars and how they work, they are now less intimidating. They do, however, remain a complex machine that displays one of man’s greatest inventions. The thought aroused from this. Here is a complex mechanical machine that man has created. A machine that the average man does not even comprehend its greatest potential. However, we as man, we are the most advanced machine to ever grace this planet and still, most of us are operating at less the fraction of the potential that we possess.
It has been said many times before but it is crucial to keep saying it. Everything that we use, everything that exists around us, everything that ensures our survival in the world we live in, most of it comes from the ideas put forth by man. Someone figured to put rock into fire to make steel. Someone figured to use that steel to hunt and make houses. A human found means to manipulate the elements of nature to create a better, safer and friendlier existence for himself and fellow man. The power of the primitive mind produced the blueprint of the ideas that drive the inventions of today. Even the complex machine that is a car comes from the mind of a human. As over played as that notion is, it is always important to remember that we, by ourselves are very advanced beings. On top of that, we possess an even more advanced power that is housed within the dome of our heads.
In the pursuit of survival, our minds seek better ways to achieve that. More so, our minds continue to seek the path of least resistance. Think of the electricity that lights our homes. It is far more easier, safer and quicker to light a whole home with a switch of a button than it is with candles and paraffin lamps. The inventions of our mind continue to create and seek methods to equip us with better skills to ensure our survival. The key question now becomes how does it happen? What inspires man to seek the thrill of adventure in order to find the answers to be more efficient in their survival?
Most of us know the call of adventure too well. The lure of the forbidden. The exploration of the unknown ringing in the ears, waiting for your response. The mind will begin to channel and display all the signs of danger of the adventure. For an entrepreneur starting a new business, the mind will show the entrepreneur the facts of business failures, the difficulty of business success and the sacrifices that come with starting a business. For the young artist, the mind will begin to show you the life of a “starving artist”, the rate of failure for most artists and that you’ll be an outcast to society. The mind will do all in its power to show a path safer. The path of finding employment, the path of wearing the latest trends so you fit in, the path that goes along the grain so that you guarantee your survival. The call of adventure for some, simply isn’t loud enough for them to answer.
Looking at the car, it takes a regular level of skill to modify a car. Even repairing a car requires a certain level of skill that one learns from experience and learning. The same with the complex machine that is our brain. It takes a certain level of mental skill to modify the habits that programme the wiring of our minds. It takes a certain level of mental fortitude to effectively modify behaviours that constitutes our way of living. Inasmuch some respond to the call of adventure, those with experience will do everything in their abilities to ensure that they follow the path of least resistance in their journey. The entrepreneur who lost all his money because he thought that a verbal bond between friends is good enough will not make that mistake again. The next time that the entrepreneur enters into business, the wiring of his brain will remind him of the pain he experienced and thus, he will make sure that there is a paperwork even among friends. It is true that some experiences are so painful that the mind will wire itself to ensure that experience is never re-lived. The moment that symptoms of that experience make themselves visible, the mind will seek ways to avoid the experience from happening again.
This is easier to see with relationships. Those that have been hurt severely by those they loved, the moment they see similar symptoms with their current partner, they quickly back away. A young girl in her teenage years will love freely and fully. She would embrace the power of forgiveness and do all she can to ensure that her relationship with her loved one survives. The same girl gets hurt a couple of times by men she loved and eventually this girl no longer tolerates pain. She no longer embraces the power of forgiveness and the moment a similar symptom of past pain emerges, she quickly ends the relationship. No one can blame her. She is doing all she can to protect herself from being emotionally hurt.
However, this becomes a problem when she lets go of a man who loved her as well. The young entrepreneur has been robbed so many times from his wealth that he can no longer see a genuine investor who sees potential in his business. To the entrepreneur, he becomes skeptical of everything and everyone and for him to survive; his mind wires him to pass very opportunity that is presented to him.
The ability to override this default setting of our brains requires a certain level of maturity. A certain level of maturity is required to understand that not all men are trash. A certain level of maturity is required to understand that not all women are gold diggers. A certain level of maturity is required to understand that some things that seem to be too good to be true actually do turn out to be true. This level of maturity is the missing ingredient that is void in most minds.
To compensate for this maturity, some people go the extreme. The young man who has been hurt so many times by women, he continues to date and cheat on women. He is seeking validation within himself to confirm that he is worthy as a man. However, at the expense of emotionally hurting the women he pursues. Lesser men who seek validation for their existence, down play fellow man’s dreams. They continue to pry into their business and seek to find something to point out as a failure so that they feel good. This feeling is to help them find meaning to their life. Hence the expression that friends are the worst people to have in your corner. Not all friends but most of them. So called friends, some are standing by the side-lines waiting for you to fail. They envy your accomplishments and refuse to see you succeed. Some are defeated by life and refuse to let their companions to advance in life when they are not. Throughout the histories, it is the brother’s keeper who wielded the dagger that stabbed the king's heart. This derives from the fact that, we humans are social creatures and create social classes so that we survive. Thus, lacking the maturity to understand the call of adventure to break away from the social class, for a better life, many (mostly friends from the same social class) resort to being spiteful.
Not all friends are like this. However, only those with the same call to adventure will achieve the heightened level of maturity to unlock the true potential of their minds. A friend you work out with will understand you better when you mention concepts of dieting and so forth. A friend who aspires to work out might not understand concepts of dieting but will appreciate being fed the knowledge about those concepts. A friend who envies you however, will do everything to reduce you to their level. They will indicate areas where they believe they can outperform you. They will mock you about your dieting and so forth. The danger being that we, as men, will laugh and take it as a joke. However, unlocking the maturity that unlocks the full extent of our minds, we understand that words shape our minds- even idle ones and those said in humour.
It is not easy to go against the grain but the complex wiring of our human bodies make it possible. The laws that govern the universe and everything in it, enables our minds to hear the call of adventure, to answer the call and to take the leap of faith. It requires a different skillset to take that leap. As much as one would not jump off a building without a safety rope, the same applies with the person who leaps with faith. Faith in itself has laws that protect us when we jump into it. Ignorance of these laws not only leads to a shallow life, but also leads to death. By understanding the laws that govern our lives and how we ought to live, provide us with the skillset to re-wire our minds to walk a higher path. These laws provide us not only with the maturity on unlock greater chambers of understandings of minds, but also the skillset to design the life we want. The brain will continue to seek the path of least resistance. It will continue to show the signs of danger so that we are safe and continue to survive. But, possessing the skillset to rewire the mind effectively, the brain will seek that path at the tune of your heart.
A heart and mind in sync is what you call happiness. Ultimately, that’s what we want.