I find myself very comfortable lately. Very comfortable. You know, I’ve been seeing a song about how I am going to quit my job (again) and how I will not look back. Interestingly, I had a dream that questioned whether am I really going to do it or is it just a matter of blowing steam.
In the dream, life wasn’t perfect. It wasn’t a life of millions where I had everything at my fingertips. Nop. Ironically, in the dream, life was as is right now. But the difference was that I was living the life that I wanted. And again, I didn’t see any material items in the dream. But I lived life freely in the dream.
And obviously, one wakes up and remembers that it is all a dream. One remembers that it is all but an escape. The dream is a life in another dimension enjoyed seconds before waking up. But as I woke up and sat by the edge of the bed, I asked myself why am I not living that dream.
I mean, that dream honestly was not far-fetched. It was as attainable as getting a glass of water from the tap (the irony being that is actually rare these days). It was as attainable as hearing the birds chirp in the morning. But, for some reason, that dream seemed so far away.
And so, I asked myself why. Why does feel like that dream was far away? And it hit me: Comfort.
You see, comfort can take many forms. There’s comfort like staying an extra 10 minutes in bed on a cold Winter morning. There’s comfort like watching TV and not working out comfort. That’s usually the comfort that most people subscribe to.
And then there’s comfort’s not-so-good-looking twin sister who excites your inner desires. The somewhat evil comfort. The comfort that takes form in a woman settling for a man who consistently cheats on her. This is the “better the devil you know” comfort. And this is the comfort I find myself flirting with.
You see, I have quit my job before. And I did so unceremoniously without any regret. But things did not go as planned. And honestly, as I look back at that time, I can say that my environment was not conducive of the action I took.
I love my parents. I love my parents to death. But they have never made a million. They have been employees all their lives. Yes, my dad has been more entrepreneurial but his entrepreneurial endeavours supplemented his life never sustained it. So even though they tried their level best to honestly support me and try to push me on, subliminally they would steer me to a world of employment. And returning to the world of employment remains my biggest regret (followed by leaving KZN to come to this God-forsaken province).
And truthfully, we cannot deny the power of influence and the environment one is in. My brother, when he was still working in Harrismith, every Sunday, he would take me on a ride around the rich sides of Harrismith. Without fail. My brother, every single Sunday, would take me on a ride around the rich sides of Harrismith. Once a month, my brother would take a weekend off and go somewhere. Either to Bloemfontein or somewhere outside of Harrismith. And he told me that Harrismith can easily make you comfortable if you are not careful.
It seems I’m going left, but please stay with me. I once had the privilege to be around really rich men in my life. And this is something that one of my closest friends once said about his profession and being around really successful farmers. Through that conversation, I learnt that Ferrari and Lamborghini will only sell you their cars if you have had a sportscar before. Maybe in the form of a M4 or R8 or something of this nature.
I remember how those guys were glorifying credit. They were explaining some cheat codes to acquire more credit in order to generate wealth. They were practically explaining what Ray Dailo once said that credit should be for wealth creation and not personal consumption.
Now, those were once-off events I went to way back in the day. I don’t know millionaires, personally. In my social circle, there is no one who has that type of wealth (or yet). So most conversations with individuals in my social circle, especially with things like credit, well, credit is bad. Instead, credit should be for buying furniture from Barlows. Credit should be for buying appliances from Game. And because we don’t know credit, we don’t know how to manage it. Hence most people within my social circle find myself in great debt for misusing credit.
And you quickly realise that it’s not their fault. Like myself, they were never taught how to use credit effectively. Instead, they are taught to open a money builder, money saver, money whatever account to “save” money at a “return” of about 2%-3%, which is effectively a loss given that the inflation rate is nearing 6% with absolutely no indication of dropping soon.
And this is where the comfort I’m talking about sets in. When I try to engage these individuals about how to properly use credit or to risk it in some money-making opportunity, it becomes too much work. It becomes something that will be a waste of time and energy. The devil whom they know so well seduces them into a life of comfort. They would rather continue praying for a miracle than actively work towards making a miracle.
And the power of influence should not be underestimated. If these people are close to you, and I’ve learnt that if these people have had some authority over your life (like an older sibling or parents), you can consciously reject their employee-minded advice but subconsciously that advice will sit.
You know, arriving in Gauteng I told myself I am going to hit the road hard and looking for money-making opportunities. But what happened? I found myself enrolled for another qualification being a homebody because that’s what those around me do. Trust me, they did not discourage me from looking for the opportunities, but because that’s a devil they do not know, they did not endorse me knocking on his door.
I challenge you. Engage someone who you love and respect on your dreams. Or engage them on someone who is living your dreams. I guarantee you that the conversation will be filled with slight envy. The conversation will be filled with slight jealousy. Somehow, the success of the person you admire is not by their might according to these people. Somehow their success has to do with witchcraft, sleeping with powerful men or just being lucky.
In the same breath, if you have this luxury, engage someone who has attained the success you want with the same question. I guarantee the conversation will be way different. Instead of the success being a product of witchcraft or blessings from rich men, this person will break down their success in steps. They will show you areas where their lives turned for the better. They will show you areas and decisions that the person took that opened the doors to their success. To them, this success can studied and replicated.
And I won’t lie, I have been a victim of this comfort. I honestly allowed myself to be comfortable. I allowed myself to grovel and cuss work but lacked the energy to change. I think the signs were clear when I cancelled my gym membership. It became clear to me when I found myself giving myself more to work than my own entrepreneurial endeavours.
I am glad that is changing now but that will be a conversation for another day. In this conversation, I wanted to ask you how comfortable are you. Whether it be the good comfort or the more sinister comfort. Just how comfortable are you? And if that comfort is robbing you of your success, what are you doing to destroy it?
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