It Could Never Be Me.

“It could never be me,” he remarked while watching a news clip on his phone. He was working from home that day. It was a slow day, so he killed time by being on his phone.

The report was a short video clip on TikTok about a man who had, allegedly, raped his wife. The reporter explained that the wife had taken her husband to court for forcing himself on her. Allegedly (even though there were censored parts of the video on TikTok, yet the full uncensored video was on Twitter), the husband misunderstood her no and thought it was foreplay.

“Every guy knows that no means no,” slightly annoyed, he switched the app off.

But the clip bothered him. How could the husband misunderstand his wife’s no? The report says that they had been together for close to a decade. Surely, he must have known that no means no, right? A 35-year-old man not understanding this basic rule? Something must be wrong with him.

“That man must still be a child,” he said to himself. Because only children still get excited about the exposed flesh of a woman. Not a grown man.

Grown men have seen exposed women. They have seen them on websites they visit at night in incognito mode. They dated women who eventually allowed them to see their exposed flesh. A man who can’t control his lust is still a child. Such a man still needs to grow up and understand his masculinity a bit more.

Maybe that’s the problem. Maybe the husband has not explored enough of his masculinity. Perhaps the husband was one of those nerds who lived in their books until they started earning money. And now that they have money, they are excited to see women flocking to him. Perhaps that’s where the husband is in his journey of understanding his masculinity. Because how can, as a grown man, not understand your woman, a woman you married for 10 years, that when she says no, she means no?

Or perhaps it was the woman’s fault. Perhaps she had been denying him for weeks or months. And so, as her husband, he was collecting what he paid lobola for. For isn’t that the purpose of marriage? For a man to have a secured outlet for his lust?

“Yes, that could be the problem,” he told himself.

He figured that could be the problem. That maybe his wife was this modern woman who does not understand what a man has needs. Women want the wedding but not the marriage. And part of marriage is that when a man wants some sugar, she, the wife, needs to give him all the sugar he wants and more.

Or maybe she is one of those who marry for money. Not sure whether the husband has money, but maybe she married him for money. Janet Jackson married a very wealthy prince once. And after 2 years or so, after giving him a child, they filed for divorce. Marriage, in the world of today, can be transactional. So maybe it was the cashout that the wife was waiting for. Especially in today’s climate when a woman can claim rape, even without evidence, and she will win the battle.

“Yes, that is the problem! It’s the wife! These women of today are just not to be trusted,” he said to himself, with a confidence that he had solved the allegation.

He dismissed the thought. He was happy with his conclusion that the wife was the problem. But he was also annoyed that he fell victim to a rage-bait video on social media. The rage welled in him. The thought continued to float in the rage. He picked up his phone and went to Twitter.

Curiosity had gotten the better of him. He wanted to watch the full video to fully understand the context of the allegations. The notion that a husband of close to 10 years misunderstood his wife’s no did not make sense to him, even though he had drawn a conclusive conclusion that satisfied his curiosity.

He was always taught (more accurately, he taught himself) that there are various nos that a woman says. There is the direct no, which means exactly what it implies. There is the suggestive no that hangs on the fence. The no that, if you are uncertain, means no; it's wise for the man to take as a direct no. And there’s the playful no. The no that means no, don’t stop. A double-negative no that cancels the meaning of the word.

After a few clickbait videos, he finally stumbled on the video on Twitter. It was seven minutes long. The video was recorded by what seems to be a security camera that the couple had in the bedroom. The camera captured not only the visuals, but the audio as well. A high-end camera it was, as the footage was full HD.

“So the man has money. I mean a security cam in the bedroom? Of such a high quality? Maybe he has a safe somewhere in there,” he said himself.

In the video, the couple is seen on a large King-size bed. The sheets and duvet looked rich and voluminous. The husband was behind his wife. He was the large spoon in their cuddle. She was curled in his embrace, warmly and calmly, it seemed. Even though it was a whisper, the security camera managed to capture some of the audio.

“Babe,” the boyfriend said in a whisper.

“Love,” the girlfriend responded in the same whisper.

“I want you,” he continued.

There was a silence. He repeated himself, pressing himself more on her, as the duvet shifted as he moved.

“Did you hear me? I want you,” he said slightly louder but still seductively.

“No,” she responded. As she said this, she moved further away from him, pulling some of the duvet with her.

“But…”

He was interrupted while watching the video. He quickly locked his screen. Puzzled, his girlfriend wondered why he was shocked to see her. She had gone to the grocery store to buy a few items for their apartment.

“What is on your phone? Are you cheating or what?” she asked him rather playfully.

“No, you know I would never do that,” he responded in the same joking manner.

She brushed the conversation off. She made her way to the kitchen. Before she started unpacking the things that she had bought, she told him that she wanted to change her clothes. Their apartment was a studio apartment; the kitchen separated by a partition wall that had an open doorway between the two.

The relationship entering its fifth year, they had reached levels of comfort that she freely dressed and undressed in his presence. His mind was still on the video. From the seconds of the footage he saw before his girlfriend walked in, it did not look like rape.

Papa Action trapping innocent Dudu violently in a dirty workshop with Chester watching- that’s rape. The taxi driver using his strength and threatening Hazel, claiming she belongs to him- that’s rape. In this video, it merely looked like a couple cuddling. And as a man, he had to take the initiative. It seemed he was being decisive, taking the lead as a man should. Taking what belongs to him as a married man.

His uncles used to tell him that women love being led. Women love a man who takes the bull by the horns. ‘Monna ke nku’ for a reason cause women don’t love a weak man. They despise such a man, his uncles would strongly say. Like the idiom states, a man is a sheep. Even faced with death, like a sheep, a man can defecate himself, wet himself, embarrass himself, but he must never cry. He must never display any weakness whatsoever. Weakness of any kind is an active repellent to any woman his uncles would emphasise passionately.

Even the masters of stoicism he watches on YouTube confess to the same thing. His favourite master is a YouTuber by the name Mark29 (real name Tshepang Maleka). Even though Mark29 is 24 years of age (and he, himself, is 31), Mark29 repeats what his uncles taught him when he began to learn the second function of his long John.

And Mark29 dates nothing but 10s. He dates and records private, intimate moments with influencers that every man desires. There is a video that went viral after he posted himself with his rival, TwitchLord87's wife. In the video, among the loud groans and moans of the wife, he berates his rival, saying that this is what happens when a man ‘steps up’ for a single mother. However, there's one video Mark29 posted on Twitter that lived in his mind. It was a video of Mark29 with LesegoTheHumbleMakoti.

The reason the video of Mark29 with Lesego imprinted on his mind was because Lesego was secretly his Insta crush. When he saw the video, he was bewildered. Lesego, age 29, presents herself as a lady among ladies on her socials. She was married to what seems to be the ideal man. She was a housewife with her husband providing her with everything. From the bare necessities such as groceries to luxury items such as a beautiful black Maserati GranTurismo. She lacked for nothing in her marriage.

There are no thirst trap videos or pictures of herself, even on Twitter. She cultivated a social media presence that earned her prestigious awards and accolades for embracing a positive view of womanhood. One of the most respected women politicians even went on record that she wishes more women to grow up and see themselves in Lesego, as that’s what the world needs from women.

Only for her to be caught in a sex scandal that Mark29 shared on his Twitter feed. In that video, Lesego was performing and doing things that even seasoned OnlyFans models could not even imagine doing. The angles at which she contorted her body, in various positions, could earn her gold awards at the Olympics.

Close to the end of the video, there was a close-up shot of her tongue teasing Mark29's tip. His solid member kept twitching with each lick of her tongue. She continued playing with his tip, her lips around the head with her tongue swirling around his corona. Periodically, she’ll pull away, intentionally edging Mark29. The smile on Lesego’s face each time she pulled away was one of satisfaction.

Mark29 couldn’t resist any longer and shot several thick volumes of himself on her face. Lesego, when she figured he had shot his last threads (after several in a few seconds), took the whole of Mark29 in her mouth. He was trembling, his body jerking; the video ended with him dropping the phone. In the caption, he stated that it was difficult for him to hold his phone any longer while Lesego was snatching his soul and that of his ancestors.

After he saw this clip of Lesego and Mark29, a proud, misogynistic chauvinist, it proved to him that indeed women cannot and will not tolerate a weak man. She will not respect and tolerate the ideal gentleman she speaks of. That’s why wives of these gentlemen always find themselves in bed with dogs like Mark29.

A man must lead. He must take initiative. He must dominate, period. To distract himself from thinking about the video for too long, he figured it best to go check the things that his girlfriend had bought.

“Babe, did you forget the biltong?” He asked his girlfriend while he went through the Woollies bags.

After no response, he poked his head through the doorway to ask his girlfriend again. He felt a rush of blood in his veins. She had her back towards him, facing the wall. An African woman with African proportions, her wide hips, voluptuous thighs and full, round yet soft glutes were the parts of her body still covered. Following her convex hips into her concave waist, her busty bosom hung freely. It seemed she had just taken her top off as he caught them swinging.

Lust took over him. He approached her gingerly from the back. He had no point of view to admire. Everything about his woman, from his vantage point, raged his fancies. His left hand reached in front of her, cupping her right 34H-size breast. He did this intentionally so that her left breast could rest on his arm.

“Babe, not now, please,” she said.

She did not move. She did not fight her off. He pressed himself close to her. His hard member permeated through the seams of his sweatpants, throbbing as it pressed against her full African bottom.

“Babe,” she repeated, calmly.

“She’s not fighting, is she? I know she loves this. Let me just,” He pressed himself even harder. Like a solid steel rod pushing into a sandbag, he wanted to let her feel how hard and ready he was.

“Baby, please stop,” she said, calmly without resisting him. At this point, he kissed her at the nape of her neck.

“I know you love playing hard to get,” He continued, thinking to himself.

His grip on her became firmer. With both hands, he held her around the waist. He tried to turn her towards the bed and bend her over. She was stiff. She was reluctant to move.

Feeling the resistance, he said, “I can’t resist you, you know that.”

She did not respond. Her body still resisted being moved even though his strength was overcoming it. He managed to get her to face the bed. Slowly, he bent over to the small of her back. With his tongue, he began a steady ascent up her spine. The sensations caused her body to quiver.

“I know you can’t resist me too,” he said to himself when he saw her body react.

With his right hand now placed between her shoulder blades, he pushed her forward. She landed with her arms fully stretched. Her full breasts swung and oscillated as they hung from her. The sight of them fuelled his lust even more.

“Babe, should I stop?” he asked her.

There was no response. He pulled his pants down. Standing on full attention, veins popped around his member, ready to pierce the sacred cow, as she told him that’s what her Zulu brothers call it. He leaned in, gently licking her ear. He whispered, “Babe, should I stop?”

With a very faint voice, she responded, “Yes.”

At this point, the strength in her arms was beginning to fade. The more he pressed himself against her, the more it became difficult for her to hold her arms. Eventually, they collapsed, and she was forced to rest on her elbows.

As well as with her back. The more she tried to resist he’s continually dry thrusts, the more difficult it was to maintain a straight back. Her back finally gave in, arching in a way that slightly raised her hips.

“I know my woman”, he thought to himself.

Her legs still stood straight. He proceeded to pull her black leggings down. The struggle to pull them ignited extra fuel to his burning passion. With each tug, her busty, bubbly behind would jiggle. Enticed by the involuntary twerk, he reached down to lick her half-exposed left cheek.

“Baby, should I stop?” he asked again. Blinded by lust, he asked this to fulfil his own desires.

“Yes,” she responded again, with a small, faint voice.

With his right foot, he pushed her right foot to make a way for himself. The tug forced her knees to bend slightly. He placed his hands firmly on her hips, on the area the Internet calls the thass. He bent his knees, pushing them forward between hers, preventing her from closing her legs. Calculating the angle at which to thrust his spear into her, he steadily positioned himself.

With the tip of his rod, feeling the moist of her salivating bottom lips, he said to her again, “Tell me to stop.”

There was no response. He was told by the older men in his neighbourhood that silence means consent. After all, this is his woman. She belongs to him. He can take and have her whenever he wanted. Their families know each other. In November of that year, her family is expecting eight full-grown cows.

They have had wild scenarios before. His favourite was when she was the naughty student, and he, the strict teacher, disciplining her. If Lesego, the perfect role model for women young and old, understood the assignment with Mark29, the epitome of masculine toxicity, his girlfriend was no exception.

And unlike Mark29, that chauvinistic pig, he was a good man to his girlfriend. Her girlfriend lacked for nothing. He makes sure that he respects her boundaries. They don’t have children cause his girlfriend told him that she is still studying towards her LLB. He makes sure to wash the dishes and cook on nights when her girlfriend is busy. As a man, he humbles himself to his woman. He is a good man, and she should be thankful that he is.

“I know my woman, I know she wants this.”

He tightened his grip, secured his feet. Savouring the sweet, slimy sweat around her opening, he slowly thrusted his full, erect spear into her. She let a little short moan as he penetrated her, pulling her hard to himself, as he pressed himself deep in her.

Indeed, she belongs to him. She is his property. He does not go out on Friday and return on Sunday. His friends have been told not to invite him to braais anymore cause in those braais there are loose women ready to entertain any man for the moment. He does everything for his woman. Half of his wage goes to her every month. A quarter of it goes to her family. No, he is a good man. And her body is his reward for being such an amazing man in a world filled with Mark29s.

“You mine, bitch”

Blinded and lost in lust, he didn’t realise that her short little moan was a silent short cry.